The Blessed Lord said: You grieve for those who are not worthy of grief, and yet speak words of wisdom. But the wise do not grieve for the departed nor for those who have not departed.
Commentary: Grief arises in a person when he creates a division in the beings and objects of the world, thinking: "These are mine, and these are not mine; these are my own kinsmen, and these are not my own kinsmen; these belong to my varna, and these do not belong to my varna; these belong to my ashrama, and these do not belong to my ashrama; these are on my side, and these are not on my side." Attachment, desire, affection, and clinging develop towards those we consider our own. From these very attachments, desires, etc., arise grief, anxiety, fear, agitation, restlessness, anguish, and other defects. There is no defect or misfortune that does not arise from attachment, desire, etc.—this is the principle.
In the Gita, Dhritarashtra first asked what his sons and the sons of Pandu did on the battlefield. Although the Pandavas regarded Dhritarashtra with even greater respect than their own father, Dhritarashtra had attachment in his mind towards his own sons. Therefore, he had a discriminatory bias towards his sons and the Pandavas, thinking: "These are mine, and these are not mine."
The same attachment that was in Dhritarashtra also arose in Arjuna. However, Arjuna's attachment was not the same as Dhritarashtra's. Arjuna did not have the partiality that Dhritarashtra had; therefore, he called everyone his own kinsmen—'seeing these kinsmen' (1.28)—and also called Duryodhana and others his kinsmen—'for how can we be happy, O Madhava, by killing our own kinsmen?' (1.37). The meaning is that Arjuna had attachment towards all the Kuru dynasty members, and it was due to that attachment that he was grieving at the prospect of their death. To remove this grief, the Lord gave Arjuna the teachings of the Gita, which begin with this eleventh verse. At the end, the Lord will declare this very grief to be improper, saying: "Take refuge in Me alone; do not grieve"—'do not grieve' (18.66). The reason is that grief arises only from taking refuge in the world, and by taking exclusive refuge in Me, all your grief, anxiety, etc., will be destroyed.
'You grieve for those who are not worthy of grief'—In the entire world, there are only two things: the eternal (sat) and the non-eternal (asat), the embodied soul (shariri) and the body (sharira). Of these two, the embodied soul is indestructible, and the body is destructible. Both are not worthy of grief. The indestructible never perishes; therefore, grieving for it is utterly unfitting. The destructible is bound to perish; it does not remain in a stable form even for a moment; therefore, grieving for it is also unfitting. The meaning is that grief can be justified neither for the sake of the soul nor for the sake of the bodies. The only cause for the arising of grief is ignorance (foolishness).
Whatever situation arises before a person in the form of birth-death, gain-loss, etc., is the fruit of prarabdha, i.e., one's own past actions. To grieve over that favorable or unfavorable situation, to become happy or sorrowful, is sheer foolishness. The reason is that whether the situation is favorable or unfavorable, it has a beginning and an end—meaning, that situation did not exist before and will not remain in the end. That which does not exist in the beginning and the end is not stable even for a moment in the middle. If it were stable, how could it perish? And if it perishes, how can it be stable? To rejoice or grieve over such a momentarily perishing favorable or unfavorable situation, to become happy or sorrowful, is only foolishness.
'And yet speak words of wisdom'—On one hand, you are uttering words of wisdom, and on the other hand, you are also grieving. Therefore, you are merely making statements. In reality, you are not wise; because those who are wise never grieve for anyone.
With the destruction of the family, the family dharma will be destroyed. With the destruction of dharma, women will become corrupted, leading to intermixture of varnas. That intermixture will lead the destroyers of the family and their family to hell. Due to the non-receipt of pinda and water, their ancestors will also fall—even from your words of wisdom, it is proven that the body is perishable and the soul is imperishable. If the body itself were imperishable, there would be no fear of the destroyers of the family and the family going to hell, no anxiety about the fall of the ancestors. If you are anxious about the family and the ancestors, if you fear their fall, then it proves that the body is perishable and the soul residing in it is eternal. Therefore, your grieving over the destruction of bodies is improper.
'For the departed and for those who have not departed'—The separation of the body and prana is inevitable for all. For some, the separation of body and prana has occurred, and for some, it is yet to occur. Therefore, one should not grieve for them. The grief you have expressed is your mistake.
To grieve for those who have died is a great mistake. The reason is that grieving for dead beings causes those beings to suffer pain. Just as the pinda and water offered for the deceased reach them in the other world, similarly, the phlegm and tears shed for the deceased have to be consumed by the deceased soul helplessly (Note p. 48). One should not grieve even for those who are still alive. For them, one should provide care and nourishment, make arrangements. One should never have anxiety-grief about what will happen to them! How will they be sustained! Who will help them! etc.; because there is no benefit in anxiety and grief.
The loosening of my limbs, the drying of my mouth, etc.—the root cause for the arising of these disturbances is identifying oneself with the body. The reason is that by identifying with the body, a sense of belonging arises with those who nurture and sustain the body, and it is due to that sense of belonging that anxiety-grief is arising in Arjuna's mind at the prospect of his kinsmen dying, and it is from that anxiety-grief that the aforementioned disturbances are manifesting in Arjuna's body. Herein, the Lord has indicated grief for both the 'departed' and the 'not departed' as the cause. Those whose prana has departed are 'departed', and those whose prana has not departed are 'not departed'. 'The ancestors fall due to non-receipt of pinda and water' (1.42)—this is Arjuna's anxiety for the 'departed'. And 'Those for whom we desire kingdom, enjoyments, and pleasures are standing in battle, abandoning hope for life and wealth' (1.33)—this is Arjuna's anxiety for the 'not departed'. Therefore, both these anxieties are arising concerning the body; hence, these two anxieties are essentially one. The reason is that both the 'departed' and the 'not departed' are perishable.
For both the 'departed' and the 'not departed', performing one's duty is not a matter for anxiety. For the 'departed', offering pinda and water, performing shraddha and tarpana—this is the duty; and for the 'not departed', making arrangements, providing for sustenance—this is the duty. Duty is not a subject for anxiety; rather, it is a subject for consideration. From consideration, one understands duty, and from anxiety, consideration is destroyed.
'The wise do not grieve'—The intellect endowed with discrimination between the eternal and the non-eternal is called 'panda'. Those in whom that 'panda' has fully developed, i.e., those who clearly discriminate between the eternal and the non-eternal, are the wise. In such wise persons, there is no grief concerning the eternal and the non-eternal; because accepting the eternal as eternal does not cause grief, and accepting the non-eternal as non-eternal does not cause grief. The Self is of the nature of the eternal, and the changing body is of the nature of the non-eternal. Grief arises only by accepting the non-eternal as eternal, i.e., grief arises from the notion that these bodies, etc., should remain just as they are, that they should not die. Concerning the eternal, there is never any anxiety or grief.
Connection: To resolve the doubt as to why grieving for the eternal principle is improper, the next two verses are spoken.
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